Short Post

I had to admit that even though a week has passed I still couldn’t believe that Sidney gave me an engagement ring. I know its not really an engagement ring, but it also is going to be one day. It was weird having it around my neck. Everything seemed so official now. Its not like we weren’t committed to eachother or something like that, it just meant so much more now. I was scared, I wasn’t going to lie. I was so scared because even though I knew I loved Sidney, forever was a long time away.

Needless to say, my parents weren’t too excited about it. Don’t get me wrong, my parents loved Sidney. But I am 19, they didn’t think I would be thinking about marriage. For all they knew, I still didn’t believe in marriage. Which would be true if Sidney wasn’t Sidney.

“What happens if I lose it?” I asked him one night we were at dinner and I was looking at my necklace with the ring on it.

“I’ll buy you a new one.” He simply said. It seemed like nothing to him. He seemed so sure everything. I just gave him a look.

“What’s really wrong?” He asked me.

“Nothing. I’m fine.”

“You have been acting weird lately.”

“I’m fine.” I insisted.

“The ring freaked you out didn’t it?”

“Its not like I don’t love you.” I said.

“I know, Jo.”

“Its just now what happens if we break up? What happens if we have one of our infamous fights and we are like we are done. I know I always said that the next time would be it, but I don’t know. It just seems like now if we do break up, it would be for real because of this ring.” I said.

“First of all, I don’t think we are going to break up. And nothing has changed because of this ring. I love you and this ring just symbolizes that. I don’t want you to think I want to be with someone else. I don’t want you to worry when I’m on an away trip. I love you and when you see this ring you should know that you are the only girl that will ever be enough.” He said.

I just looked at him. He always knows exactly what to say. I know he usually means everything he says. But he can’t possibly be as sure as he sounds. He was always the one that would be unsure. He was the one that doubted things more than me. That’s what Brittany was all about. That’s what every fight stems from. I do love Sidney and I don’t want him to doubt that, but I’m still unsure about a few things, having this ring doesn’t change that.