Chapter Seventy-Nine

“I don’t want to leave.” I said with tears rolling down my face looking up at Sidney. We were standing in the airport, I was about to leave.

“Baby, of course I don’t want you to leave either.” He said wiping a tear from my face.

“I can’t leave you.” I said crying some more and hugging him.

“I will be back in a month. Then we can be together.” He whispered in my ear.

“I know, I’m just scared.” I said looking up at him.

“Don’t be. I love you and that’s what matters. We will talk everyday and I will miss you everyday. I love you and 4 silly weeks is not going to change that.” He said.

“Promise?” I asked.

“Of course, I promise. I love you.” He said giving me a kiss.

“You better go.” He said. We kissed again.

“I love you.” I said and turned away to walk toward the plane.

I miss you already.

Sidney, I love you. I will text you as soon as we are allowed to use phones. My heart already hurts : (

This is going to sound stupid, but this is the first time I have wished I wasn’t going to Pittsburgh.

Jo, I will be there soon.

Not soon enough.

You will have soccer and Simon and Sophie.

It doesn’t matter who I have, I just want you.

You are too cute. No panic attacks yet?

I think my heart is hurting too much to actually care that I am flying.

Oh well atleast there is one positive

Oh yeah! Its awesome!

I’m writing you a letter.

Shut up, Sid. You are not.

I am. Its our thing, so I figured this month we will write letters. You say things in letters you would never say to me, I like it.

Why do you like reading things I write so much?

Because when you write, you don’t think. When I read something that you have written, I have a better glimpse of your soul.

When you get back, I want to play hockey with you and Jake.

You will be playing soccer.

We don’t know that yet.

I do, your knee is fine. I can’t wait to come and wear my RMU attire and cheer on my girlfriend.

You are a dork.

I may be a dork, but you love me.

Cause I am a dork too. Is Jack nursing your heart back to health?

Jack is still sleeping. Its ridiculous, I don’t even want to know why he is still sleeping.

He is too much.

Yeah, babe I’m going to go work out. Text me or call me as soon as you land. I love you and I miss you.

I love you too.

When we stopped texting, tears started to fall again. I knew Sidney and I would be okay. I knew our relationship was stronger than it has ever been.

Hey, Jo. Remember forever plus eternity still wouldn’t be enough. Just remember that when you are doubting us.

Go work out! I will talk to you soon. Loves.

I know that he is the love of my life. I know that everything will be fine, but right now, it doesn’t feel like it. It doesn’t feel like anything will be fine again.