Chapter Ninety-Two

“Seriously, Sidney. I’m sick of this.” I said throwing a shirt at him. I was putting laundry away in my room. No one else was at my house so I didn’t feel bad raising my voice.

“What are you talking about?”

“This.” I said pointing at him.

“You are just blah. You aren’t happy ever. I can deal with being sad over a loss, but seriously its annoying now.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to annoy you.”

“Shut up! You know what I mean.”

“No, I really don’t.”

“I love you, Sidney. I do. But you are just a grump all the time. You mope around like that’s going to make the team better.”

“Maybe that’s the problem, Jo. I don’t know what is going to make the team better.”

“Then talk to me. Talk to me about whats wrong. Talk to me about the team. Talk to me, just don’t sit there acting like you want to be anywhere but here.” I said.

“Its just hard.”

“I know, babe. If I could help, I would.”

“Its like I don’t get why we aren’t playing well. Its not even like we are losing but playing well, we are losing and playing like shit. When we win, we aren’t even playing well. I don’t know what happened from a month ago to now.” He said.

“You will figure it out. I know it.”

“That’s the problem. Its on me. Everyone says its my fault. And yeah, maybe it is.”

“Its not your fault.”

“I’m the captain. I should be doing something.”

“You are doing something.”

“No, I’m not. I don’t know what to do. Its frustrating and I don’t know what to do. I’m sick of everyone talking about us losing. I’m sick of everything.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m not sick of you.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“I’m positive, Jo.”

“I love you more than anything.” He said.

“But yet you don’t act like it when we are together.”

“Its cause of stupid hockey. I can’t focus on anything right now.”

“I’m not blaming you, babe. Its just..”

“Its just I know. Its annoying.”

“Its not annoying. I just hate having these stupid fights every week.”

“It will be fine. I leave for Christmas in like two days.”

“Yeah, I don’t think I would describe spending Christmas apart, fine.”

“I didn’t mean that would be fine. I meant that we will be fine. We will figure it out. After I just get to see my family, it will be fine.”

“I wish you felt that way when you see me.” I said and he just looked at me like I put a knife through his heart.

“Joey, I love you.” He said putting his hand on my leg.

“I know, Sidney. And I know its hard right now.”

“I just need to figure everything out.”

“And I want to help.”

“It will all work out. I’m positive when we come back from Christmas everything will be okay.” He said.

“I want to believe you.”

“Then believe me.” He said.