chapter ninety-three

I knew that Sidney wasn’t trying to be difficult. I knew that Sidney loved me, that was obvious. I would never doubt how much he loved me. I just doubted if we should be together. I doubted if he could ever have a serious relationship while his team was suffering. Don’t get me wrong, I hate watching Sidney suffer, but I can’t handle these fights every time the team goes through a rough stretch. I don’t know what to do. I can’t help him because I’m not playing beside him. He really can’t do much either, even though he thinks he can. He is only one person on the team. It breaks my heart to see him go through every little play. It breaks my heart to know that I can’t help him figure it out. But ultimately the only thing that really breaks my heart is thinking we might not get through this.

“You know you and Sidney will be fine.” Max said on the phone right before he was suppose to leave to go back to Canada.

“Max, I don’t know what I am suppose to do.”

“Just be there for him.”

“I am, Max. I am there all the time, but I don’t want crabby Sidney. We don’t get to spend that much time together as it is and when we do is just an ass.”

“you know Sidney.” Was all Max said.

“I do know Sidney. That’s why I am worried.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean if hockey isn’t going right, nothing is going to go right. Hockey is his first priority. If something is wrong with hockey, he will focus all his energy on that.. leaving me behind.”

“He is not going to leave you behind.”

“I don’t know, Max. We didn’t even talk about Christmas. It was just decided he would go home and I would stay here. Last year, we spent Christmas together and we were only speaking for a month before that.”

“He just has a lot on his mind.”

“I know, and I’m last on his mind.”

“Joey..”

“I’m not saying I have to be first on his mind. I just want to enter it.”

“You do. Are you kidding me?! He loves you more than anyone I have ever seen.”

“Not more than hockey.”

“Since when did it have to be one or the other?”

“It doesn’t.. I don’t know.”

“It will be fine.” He said.

“Yeah, you two keep saying that.”

“Just be happy. I’ll talk to you later.”Max said.

“Yeah, have a good flight.” I said.

“Who was that?” Jake asked.

“Max.”

“Since when did you two become so close?” He asked me.

“I don’t know? He has just been hanging around. Its nice to have someone to talk too.”

“You have me.”

“You have Sophie.” I said.

“Shut up.”

“I’m not being mean. I’m being serious.”

“You can still talk to me.”

“Yeah.. but I choose to talk to Max.”

“What does Sidney have to say about that?”

“Nothing? He is friends with Max, obviously.”

“He doesn’t care that some other guy takes you to lunch and dinner and calls you?”

“No, because we are friends?” I said and he just gave me a look.

“Don’t you have somewhere else to be?” I asked and he left.

Later that night, I heard a knock on my door. I opened the door to an unexpected face. Connor.

“What are you doing here?” I asked completely surprised to see him standing outside of my bedroom door.

“Apparently, you need to talk to someone.” He said and then walked into my room.

“Who said that?”

“Jake.”

“Jake needs to learn to keep his mouth shut.”

“Just talk to me.” Connor said sitting on my bed.

“There is nothing to say.”

“I can tell that there is.”

“Connor, you can’t just come in here and think that I am going to spill my heart. You have been nonexistent in my life for months.”

“It doesn’t matter now.”

“It kind of does.”

“No, seriously. Jo, I am here. Just tell me what is wrong.”

“Nothing is wrong. Seriously. Jake just thinks every little thing is something wrong.”

“Sidney?”

“Its nothing.”

“Just tell me what it is already.” Connor said.

“Sidney is just upset about hockey.”

“And?”

“And nothing..”

“Jake called me over here because Sidney is upset about hockey?”

“I’m sorry, if you didn’t want to be here, I’m pretty sure you know where the door is located.”

“That’s not what I meant. I obviously want to be here.”

“Sidney is stressed about hockey. It kind of is messing up somethings, but everything will be fine.”

“Jake said something about Max?”

“Jake is stupid. Max and I are friends.”

“Max Talbot?”

“Yeah.”

“I didn’t know you guys were friends.”

“A lot of things happen when you stop talking to your best friend for like 4 months.”

“I’m sorry, Jo. What do you want me to say?”

“an explanation would be nice. Oh right, you don’t have one.”

“I don’t have a good one. All I can say is that I am sorry.”

“Okay.” I simply said and then Sidney called.

“Hey, thanks Connor, but I am going to talk to Sidney. I’ll talk to you later.” I said and Connor left and I answered the phone.

“Hey, babe.” I said.

“Hey, Jo.”

“How’s the family?”

“they are really good.”

“That’s good. I’m really happy.”

“Jo, I’m really sorry about before.”

“I know.”

“I shouldn’t do that.”

“I know.”

“Baby, I love you.”

“And, I love you.” I said.